Wednesday, September 25, 2013

13.38

Why am I only just now finding out about this?




We thought the Afflack thing was a big revolt.  Wait till someone tries to play Katie Parry at an NFL game.


Flashback to 1984 in New Jersey:  Action park, the only amusement park that made you sign a waiver when you walked in the door.



Mumford ‘N Done

If the Chiefs go 14-2 this year, they are still going to have to keep their fingers crossed for a wild card (no champagne)

No Joke of the week (Jow):  I love technology.   Seriously, I’m glad this exists in case I ever have to grow something.



Josh wants out

America’s cup always reminds me of One Crazy Summer, which is in my opinion the best sailboat racing movie of all time.




Just because I want to…..




I’m Batdad  (yeah, I wish)

Mow: What the fuss are these good for?  (think 1988)





Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Bursting at the Seams

Where has this been my whole life?





 DC Prayers

CO Prayers

Town Terrorized by clown, carrying teddy bear, balloons  





Playoffs??? Playoffs???  I guess the headset doesn’t fall to far from the tree

Countdown to 2012:  GTAV Riots of ‘13

Back!  






Ouch, the most famous person born yesterday (9-17) was Neil Boomcamp?  Come on, IMDB couldn’t find anyone better than that.

How:  “New York City plagued by mysterious maple syrup smell”  I’ve wet the bed enough times in my life to know what that smell is

Fact of the week (Fow) – H.O.W. is not “grossest thing of the week (Gow)”


Mystery of the Week (Mow): How the fuss do you get one of these?  



 What’s that girl, the babysitter has been abusing the baby? 




Countdown to 2012:  Fatal Brain Amoeba (FBA) –Lub

Ms. Lohan v. Ms. Lohan….0.20 will get ya 20….and that’s alright.

In honor of Friday the 13th (so I’m early), I present Jason V. v. Sloth.  Now there’s a prize fight that I would fly to vegas with leedog for. 




One-brow and bro-bowl, week two ratings bonanza . . . remember in Brave New World when everyone made the “Sign of the T” because they worshipped Henry Ford?  Well, move over Bill and Steve.

Vail makes top ten –Lub (your eyes will be glad you Lubbed)

If Flacko were my dad, I wouldn’t change his diapers when he turns 50 . . . or whenever that happens to old people.

Flashback to the mid to late 2000’s: I like tooterls



Cow: “I had this roommate in college who was always getting diarrhea and his you-know-what would get chapped, so he would jam a single square of TP between his B-cheeks to ease the pain . . . then I would always find discarded single squares lying around on the floor” -No Lub

Not to be confused with the hit TLC song “No Lubs” . . . you see it’s plural . . . too soon?



Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Never Forget

Need my fix






Was it Jimmy Kimmel?

Flashback to 1997:  Adam buys The Cure album “mixed up” because he thinks it’s got that song “all mixed up”.  Upon finding out that it was actually 311 that he indeed wanted, he attempted to return the CD to walmart.  When they refused to give him a refund, he employed the five finger “exchange”….and actually exchanged the CD!

I’m looking to move an Amana stainless steel fridge (left and right) with water filter.  I’ll take three “new pairs of socks” for it.   <<<winky-dink>>>

No tongue touching

I had another toasted pop tart for breakfast this morning…it was terrible.  When will I learn…when?

Did you hear about the guy who put a decal on the back of his pickup truck that had a picture of a tied-up kidnapped woman so it made it look like his tailgate was missing and a tied-up kidnapped woman was lying in the back.  Sounds like a good idea.  For some reason a lot of peeps called 911.

Cow:  “I just bought a push lawn mower at a garage sale for $50.  I want my father-in-law to keep mowing my yard, but I don’t want him to break my riding mower.” –Shall remain nameless.

Friends don’t let friends toast

Does “Frow” mean “Mrs.”?  If so, was Frow Farbisina actually Mrs. Farbisina?


Cow:  You gotta open that bag of chips like a bag of chips

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Cageless

What the?





Got smart watch?

I’m addicted to Alivert ready tabs.   I think about them all the time…so minty, they just dissolve on your tongue!  So, I had to settle for some claratin tabs.   Make me barf!  They tasted like air or…. plastic.

How can Tag-Team be “back again”.  They were never even here once, so as to be “back”, let alone here twice to be “back again”.


I want to get one of them nokia lumina phones but without any kind of wireless plan.  I just want the 41 megapixels.
Didn’t the Bosnians send the Serbians sarin gas?



Speaking of Libians….






The Xm radio trial is pretty cool, but 50% of the music is either pearl jam or Natasha Beddingfold.

We got the best passing QB in the nation and the best running QB in the nation…too bad it’s two dudes and not one man.

Speaking of “Two Dudes”, that is coincidently the title of Leedog’s favorite movie.

Super-sized strike of 13

Flashback to 3rd grade lunchroom:   Rory: “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles in live action is the greatest movie ever”  Stew:  “I disagree, while TMNT is a very good movie, Back to the Future Part 2 is the greatest movie ever”  Rory:  “Back to the Future Part 2 sucks”   Stew: “You know something, YOU SUCK!”.

Wow:  Panspermia-Lub

Countdown to 2012:  Panspermia -Lub

The girl who was supposed to play MJ but got fired from Spiderman: part 2 is the star of Divergent.  It looks awesome.  Why did they fire her?  She was so good in the Decendents.  Buy stock, buy stock…although she is no J-Law.

Countdown to 2012: Cosmic Caterpillar –Lub

Many Bison is spelled the same as one bison, but unlike fish, deer, or bear, those dummies pronounce it bizon…dummies.

Sometimes when I’m hitting the sunflower seeds hard, and I’m down to like 4 or 5 shells, and I bite into a really good one, I’m tempted to spit out the remaining fragments, just because I know I will never be able to top that.