Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Public Stewdity

#JadeGarden now accepts #Bitcoin

Finally saw #GoneWithTheWind . . . don’t know why they say THAT was the best movie ever? #CitizenKane and #WizardOfOz were each ten times better


#FlashbackTo1889 I knew #BoJackson was good at baseball. The dude defied gravity and ran along a wall in one of the most memorable defensive plays of all time, not to mention he had been rookie of the year. He wasn’t too shabby with the stick, 30+ homers and 100+ ribs in a season. Four consecutive homeruns in four consecutive at-bats. All-Star game MVP . . . the list goes on and on.  I remember once asking my dad if Bo was as good at football as he was at baseball and my dad simply said “He’s better”.

Remember that TV wrist watch from the Dragnet movie?  Circa “too long ago for that kind of technology to actually exist but it did”

McDonalds employees won’t go outside before 5:00 AM to change their drive-thru menu from dinner to breakfast items because it’s “not safe for someone to be outside in this neighborhood before 5:00 AM” They tell me this while I’m outside before 5:00 AM

#JosephGorgeousLevitt was on an eppy of #QuantumLeap. Pretty sure this was pre-Angels

Me and boys have been playing #SuperMarioBros3 nonstop for weeks. I’m convinced, now more than ever, that it was truly the best #NES game . . . maybe (you can’t make me fully commit to something like that)

#JasonDay breaks Tiger’s record at Whistler’s Mother

#IHadADream it was zombie apocalypse. Everyone from the neighborhood came to my house to bunker down for a last stand. I sent my Jonah, My 8-year-old son, to the store in the pickup truck by himslef. I think we needed Doritos.

*** Bo said “Just Do It”
*** Hulk Hogan said “Just Say No”
*** Stew said “I’m confused”

#FirstWorldProblems #FWP
Jason's Office mini-fridge is slightly too cold. Sometimes my Diet Cokes have a little bit of slush in them.

Wednesday, August 5, 2015



The red square rules us all

My taste buds exploded seconds before my head exploded

I know me an Matt had this conversation literally 20 years ago, but think about #MichaelBeihn and the quadrilogy. If I was stranded on an island #TomHanks style, and I could only take 4 movies with me, I think the 4 might be T1, Aliens, Abyss, and The Rock.

Anyone want to go halvsies on a Lily Camera #Lub

20 years later and I’m still not sure whether Clarissa’s pet alligator was supposed to look fake or be fake. Clear cut comic genius in either interpretation.

I’ve got a fever and the only prescription is more Peña

Anyone want to go halvsies on a sensory deprivation chamber? #Lub

Hootie from Hootie and the blowfish is coming to Topeka! Do you think blowfish is singular or plural.

Thanks Tom

#CountdownTo2012 #Cecil

#IHadADream there was a “salt and pepper” colored bunny in the bath tub. So I scooped him out with an inflatable bucket on a stick (I wasn’t about to get no rabies). As I headed for the front door, I noticed that it was actually a brown bunny and a black skunk that had morphed together as one. Then, before I got to the front door, the two animals split apart, returning to a skunk and a bunny. I flung them onto the front porch and quickly slammed the door shut, quietly thanking God I had not been sprayed by the skunk. Then Isaiah opened the front door and grabbed the skunk by the tail and started swinging him around. I started to yell for him to stop, but I was paralyzed with fear. I was so scared I could feel myself starting to wake up and I was once again trapped in that familiar in-between state where I was both lying in bed and standing in the living room watching a skunk get terrible-toweled. I tried to yell in both places, but I couldn’t.

*** showed our density destiny
*** rad cars, shoes, boards and pizzas
*** Flux Capacitor

#FirstWorldProblems #FWP Chipotle is on the other side of town. It takes the whole lunch hour just to get there and back.