Wednesday, October 31, 2012

12.43, Frankenstorm

 GMR



Countdown to 2012:  See subject line

 

Countdown to 2012:  Countdown to 2015: Episode VII

 

3 for 7

 

BCS2

 

K-State #1 in 3 out of the 6 computer polls (Alabama still only #1 in one computer poll)

 

How bad is KU?  They have zero wins against Division I-A

 

Have you seen the latest trailer for Die Hard 5:  Die SuperDuper Hard?  It actually doesn’t look too terrible.

 

Wow: Zemmiphobia – Fear of the Great Mole Rat

 

K-State beats four ranked teams in same season for first time ever.

 

Cow:  Everyone Fights, no one quits. –ST

 

50 for 9

 

How bad are the Chiefs?  It’s November and they still haven’t had a lead during a game.

 

Countdown to 2012:  Honey I shrunk the $1 McDonalds breakfast burrito.

 

Die Hard of the Week:  “All the terrorists in the world, and I kill the one that has smaller feet than my sister.”

 

With each week that passes and with each impressive K-State victory, I get sadder and sadder.  L   I know that my heart will be crushed soon.


Wednesday, October 24, 2012

12.42

That's my finger





That's my hand


 



Two computer rankings have Kstate #1 in the nation.  One computer ranking has Alabama #1.

 

7 for 7

 

4 for 7

 

BCS3

 

The chiefs bye week really screwed up my fantasy team.  hahahahahahaha

 

Iron Man iii trailer:  Nuff Said

 

Even in Metropolis, print is dead.

 

Wow:  sordid – Lub

 

Aurther Brown catches first interception of the year by eventual Heisman trophy winner for second consecutive year.

 

German PSA:  Be slightly skeptical about buying breast milk on the internet from strangers for your newborn baby.

 

Vegas odds for the Troph:  2:3

 

Hanx drops F-bom.  (I told you this was coming; new Wachowski siblings movie)

 

Tact:  Madonna pretends to shoot machine guns at Colorado audience.

 

Countdown to 2012:  Some guy went 12-monkeys and infected bank tellers by depositing contaminated money wrapped in a paper towel.

 

96 is the new 40.

 

University of North Carolina bans the word “Freshman” because it’s not “gender inclusive”.

 

Red Cheetoes = Red “you know what”.  Now we have two colors of Cheetoes punchlines.

 

I’m all in:  Carrie’s Mad.  Max is Super.  Clark is Lone. The Ranger is Dreddful.  Judge Evil.  Robo’s dead.  Copout remakes.

 

49 for 9

 

K-State beats three ranked teams on the road for first time ever.  (See Humpday Hoopla Vol. 98.44 and 12.41)

 

Wickerman 2:  Big Tex (cliché electrical fire in the neck, I’ve seen it 1000 times)

 

Tight-rope the Grand Canyon without a net?  Pack a lunch, that’s a half mile walk.

 

Klein sucks:  on average, he has thrown one incompletion per half in each of the last one games.  Quit throwing it into the dirt!!!

 

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

12.41

 Barth



3 for 7

 

BCS4

Wow:  Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia – Lub

K-State beats two ranked teams on the road for second time ever.  (See Humpday Hoopla Vol. 98.44)

 

What the hell is Circus O’lay?

 

10-11-12 marked 50 year anniversary of Vatican II.

 

Shawnee County lets you “opt. out” of the $4/month recycling program.  You only have to pay a modest opt out fee of 4$/month.

 

Bomb-Gardner goes supersonic.

 

The Bumble Bee “Tuna Tragedy of 2012” reminds me of Barth, “What do you think’s in the burgers.”  Those kids kept going back, and they would fall for it every time.

 

Akeeb 2:  Still Smoking

 

Bowling ball sized squid eyeball washes ashore in Aspen, the Sunshine State.

 

The best part about going to Menards: Unlike Worlds of Fun or Disney World, you can go back the next day.

 

K-State Victories over Hiesman champs (in same year):

1998:  Ricky “munchies” Williams

2002:  Carson “rosie” Palmer

2003:  Jason “where am I?” White

2011:  RG|||

2012:  The Human Genome Smith


Wednesday, October 10, 2012

12.40, Big Bird

 Key to a man's heart




5 for 7

 

Most expensive house in Shawnee County found to be priceless worthless.

 

MNF 666

 

Countdown to 2012:  Fungal Meningitus

 

Did you hear about the car dealership that accidently sold a car to a dude for $5,000 less than they were supposed to?  They called him the next day, after all the papers were signed and told him to bring the car back or pay $5K, and so he said NFW.  So the car dealership calls the cops and says, “Mr. Smith stole a car from us, his address is 555-5309 Elm Street.”  Then the cops came to guys house and hauled him off in the paddy-wagon.  Then a couple days later, the dealership told the dude that they were really sorry.

 

Die Hard of the Week:  “They’ll spend a month sifting through the rubble and by the time they realize what went wrong, we’ll be sitting on a beach, earning 20%”

 

We tried AJ’s Pizza.  I give it a 5.5 out of 10.  So yes, it’s the best pizza in town.

 

Cow: “Must go Faster” – Jeff Goldbloom (11 separate 90’s movies)

 

132 is the new 40

 

Countdown to 2001:  SpaceX

 

48 for 9

 

Trailer for the new Die Hard movie is out (Die Hard 5:  Die Really Really Hard).  It looks like a spoof of that movie Die Hard.


Wednesday, October 3, 2012

12.39

Higher res than the original 




Still 7&7

 

Die Hard of the Week:  “I guess we’re gonna need some more FBI guys.”

 

Tim Time?

 

The critics are saying, “if you thought Inception was too dumbed-down, then you’ll love Looper.”

 

It’s now been about 10 months since the Chiefs have led during a game.

 

Countdown to 2012:  Scientists clone a cow that makes hypoallergenic milk.  The cow is perfectly fine, except for being born without a tail!  The scientists say that being born without a tail is a common abnormality associated with the cloning process and is inconsequential.  So Drink up.

 

The Hillbilly Human Genome Smith delivers super eight.

 

I watched Avengers again (this time on home-video) and it was no better than I remembered.

 

Did you hear about the guy who caught a fish and found a human finger inside of it?  Turned out that it belonged to a dude who lost some fingers in a routine wake-board accident months earlier.  When the department of fish and wildlife called him up to tell him the good news, the conversation went like this:  “Hello Mr. Smith, this is the department of wildlife”  and his reply  “let me guess, you found my finger in a fish?”

 

One to go for cool brees

 

Tundra Endeavor:  Tundra tows Endeavor

 

Man Crush Alert:  Joseph Gorden Levvit

 

West Virginia sucks.  That QB threw 5 incompletions on Saturday.

 

Avengers might be in my top 5 favorite movies of all time, certainly top 10.